I Will, With God's Help

This day marks the seventh anniversary of my ordination to pastoral ministry. I read again and contemplate the words said, the commitments made, and I ponder my faithfulness -- and sometimes my faithlessness -- to those vows. To each of the charges made those seven years ago, I responded either "I will, with God's help," or "I will, by God's grace." I know better now just how dependent one is on God's help and God's grace. Reading the words again this day humbles me. And, I think now, a better response to each charge is "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner."

As a minister, it will be your task to proclaim by word and deed the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and to fashion your life in accordance with its precepts. You are to love and serve the people among whom you work, caring alike for the young and old, strong and weak, rich and poor. You are to lead the people of God to be obedient servants, to preach, to demonstrate concern for love, justice, and freedom, to counsel the troubled in spirit, to teach from the riches of God's grace, to serve the poor, the sick, and the oppressed, and to equip all Christian to be in ministry and in service to the community.

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Will you be diligent in the reading and study of the Holy Scriptures, and in seeking the knowledge of such things as may make you a stronger and more able minister of God?

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Will you endeavor so to minister the Word of God and the sacraments of the New Covenant, that the reconciling love of Christ may be known and received?

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Will you undertake to be a faithful pastor to all whom you are called to serve, laboring together with them and with your fellow ministers to build up the family of God?

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Will you do your best to pattern your life in accordance with the teacdhings of Christ, so that you may be a wholesome example to your people?

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Will you be faithful in prayer, both in public and in private, asking God's grace, both for yourself and for others, offering your labors to God, and with the Holy Spirit continually rekindle the gift of God that is in you?

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Will you live so that the power of God may be manifest in your life and ministry, enabling others to become disciples of Christ?

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Will you accept the duties that have beenb committed to your care, and will you discharge them faithfully in serving all persons to the glory of God?

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

For nearly six years I served in pastoral ministry to a small congregation, weekly proclaiming the Word of God, celebrating the Eucharist, and administering other sacraments as warranted. The ordination and the following ministry changed me in ways I could not have imagined. I now consider ordained ministry as an ontological vocation -- a new way of being in the world -- and not merely as an existential exercise. Though I am no longer in a position to officially exercise many of the functions of pastoral ministry -- I am, in fact, now in a church in which I am not authorized to serve pastorally or sacramentally -- I am no less a pastor than before, and my vows are no less binding. The question can never again be for me, Am I a pastor?, but only, Am I a faithful pastor? And again, I can only say,

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Easter Makes Rebels of Us All

Following is a meditation upon a theme developed by Orthodox theologian David Bently Hart in his exploration of theodicy, Door of the Sea: Where Was God in the Tsunami? In speaking of the resurrection and its victory over the powers, he writes:

Easter is an act of “rebellion” against all false necessity and all illegitimate
or misused authority, all cruelty and heartless chance. It liberates us
from servitude to and terror before the “elements.” It emancipates us from
fate. It overcomes the “world.” Easter should make rebels of us all.

Reflection

What have you with which to threaten me, what with which to make me cower, what with which to defeat me?

Loss? I count all things as loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death, if, by any means, I may attain to the resurrection from the dead (excerpts, Phil 8:8-11, NKJV).

Fear? The angel has spoken: “Do not be afraid, for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified. He is not here; for He is risen” (Mt 28:6). Jesus has spoken, “Peace to you. Why are you troubled? And why do doubts arise in your hearts? Behold My hands and My feet, that it is I Myself” (Lk 24:36, 38).

Pain? Christ has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore, I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong (2 Cor 12:9-10).

Lonliness? For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord (Rom 8:38-39). In all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us (Rom 8:37).

Death? Behold, I tell you a mystery: We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed – in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed. For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and this mortal must put on immortality. So when this corruptible has put on incorruption, and this mortal has put on immortality, then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written: “Death is swallowed up in victory.” Thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.

What have you with which to threaten me, what with which to make me cower, what with which to defeat me? Christ is risen from the dead, trampling down death by death, and on those in the tombs bestowing life. Easter makes rebel of us all.